People With Glass Products Shouldn't Throw Rules

My house needs windows.  There's no denying it.  They are pretty and awfully inefficient.  Leaded glass that keep the house good and hot in the summer and frosty cold in the winter... just like a window should not do. So I'm in the window market.  There are some compelling offers out there and it's a competitive market.

So here I am... a consumer entering the window market and who shows up a guy at my door setting appointments for estimates.  Sure, I'll listen to a pitch.  I don't let him know I've been shopping, I just say OK to have someone call to set the appointment.  I've given this company the lead in my window shopping race.

So I'm on my way home and my phone rings.

"Hello?"

"Yes, this is _______ from XYZ Windows.  You said you'd like to have an estimate on window replacement."

"Yes, I did."

"When is a good time to have our estimator come out?"

"I'll be off work a week from Tuesday.  Mornings would be better."

"Tuesday at 10?"

"Works for me."

"Will your wife be there?"

"I don't know."

"Would you like to find out before I confirm the appointment."

"No... I cannot guarantee she will be there and she doesn't need to be there."

"The installers like to have both home owners available."

"I own the house... they can deal with me."

"It's a rule, sir."

"A rule?"

"The installers have a rule that both husband and wife must be available."

"Then I am no longer interested."

"You'd like another appointment time."

"No, I'm no longer interested in doing business with your company.  I've given you an opportunity to sell me your product.  I'm in the market for your product, but you're more interested in your rules than selling windows.  You've lost a sale.  Goodbye."

That company went through a fair amount of work and cost to find me at just the right time only to waste the chance to sell me several thousand dollars of windows.  I have no way to measure the cost of the lead, but the cost per sale was infinite... since they didn't sell me anything.  That's how much their rule cost.

My point is when you advertise a product or service you better be ready to sell the customer anyway the customer wants to be sold.  No amount of lead generation can overcome a sales process that ignores the customer.  As a customer, I have so many choices that your hard work and cultivation can just end up building your competitor's business if you have a barrier to closing the sale.

Customer Service IS Marketing

Pottery Barn is a Big Brand.  They know how to market online and off.  But today I had an experience that reminds me that customer service is your most important marketing.  I bought a headboard from Pottery Barn earlier this week and received notification that it had shipped.  I live in the Dallas metro area and, according to the website would receive the order in 7 to 10 business days (an obfuscation that I detest, give it to me straight and tell me less than two weeks).

I received one part of my order today and wanted to know how the headboard would be delivered.  I called and could not get an operator in less than 10 minutes so I went to the web site and started a customer service chat.  This is what transpired.

Please wait while we find an associate to assist you...
We are now connecting you to an associate.
Earl: Thank you for shopping Pottery Barn, my name is Earl. How may I help you?
Customer: Can you tell me how a particular item is being shipped? The order number is ###########
Customer: The item is the Lewis Headborad
Customer: Headboard
Earl: I'll be happy to check that for you. One moment, please.
Earl: Thank you for your patience. The headboard will be an in home delivery. We will contact you to arrange an appointment to deliver it.
Customer: Do you have an ETA?
Earl: let me check the order for you. One moment, please.
Earl: Thank you for waiting. We should be contacting you to schedule your delivery around 5/17.
Customer: That's quite a delay for delivery... the item says it's been shipped.
Earl: I'm sorry for the confusion. It has shipped from our furniture warehouse but it is not scheduled to be your area until 5/17, when we will be contacting you.
Customer: Since I'm outside of Dallas, I expected the stated 7 - 10 business days. I'm dissapointed.
Customer: dissappointed.
Earl: I am very sorry about that, Mr. Swank. It is on the way.
Customer: Will it be sitting in a Dallas warehouse for the next two weeks?
Customer: I can pick it up if that's the case... but for almost $100 in shipping and fees I'd expect
Customer: that I could get the same delivery as Dallas.
Earl: I'm sorry, Mr. Swank. The headboard is not in Dallas. It is on it's way from the west coast.
Customer: I understand that, but since you claim 7-10 business days delivery to Dallas, and the item has been marked "Shipped" since 4/24, I should be able to assume the piece would be in Dallas by the 7th of May. That's not the 17th of May.
Customer: So even if it isn't in Dallas yet, will it be in Dallas by the 7th and can I pick it up rather than wait for you to call on the 17th?
Earl: Unfortunately, Mr. Swank, there is no way I can arrange for you to pick the item up. If it gets to Dallas any sooner, we will contact you to arrange the delivery.
Customer: I expected more.
Customer: The longer I wait for a response the less affinity I feel for your brand.
Earl: I am very sorry for that. What else would you like me to do for you today?
Customer: You've made it clear that there's nothing you can do to help your brand image, so I suppose we're done.
Earl: If there were anything I could do, I would be happy to, Mr. Swank.
Earl: We really are getting it to you as soon as we can.
Customer: Good night.
Your session has ended. You may now close this window.

You might ask, "What do you expect?"  More.  Different.  There were options that Earl had at his disposal.  Obviously, I was disappointed in the ETA (even if I couldn't spell the word... TWICE).  He could have asked if he could try to find a similar product in the area and cancel the order.  He could refund me the nearly $50 in handling and processing fees I paid above the $50 delivery fee.  He could have handed me off to a manager.  I did everything short of offering to drive to meet the truck.  I want the headboard!  From the time I note the long delivery time Earl uses the word "sorry" four times.  He never offers a solution that improves my mood.  If he'd offered to try to find a similar piece in the area I would have felt like he was trying.  Succeed or fail, it's a customer service win based on the attempt.  Instead, he didn't try... FAIL.  If he'd offered some sort of refund, I would have taken it and felt less sore about the lack of value I was getting for the money.  If Earl had passed me off to a manager, I would have felt I was getting a proper level of attention.  None of these things happened.

So, in response, I have posted this unedited transcript here on this blog, on my personal Facebook page and on Pottery Barns Facebook page.  It was there that I learned that "I'm sorry" is a mantra for Pottery Barn.  If they have a customer complaint on the Facebook page the response is something like, "I'm sorry for the issue, please leave your email so that we can message you..."  Hey, Pottery Barn, wake up!  You're failing at customer service in the social media space by not helping your public in full view of the hundreds of millions of people on Facebook.  By not rectifying the situation in public your leading potential customers to believe that you're not fixing the problems.  Do better, Pottery Barn.

The Tie Goes To The Existing Brand

Playing pickup baseball growing up one of the most heard phrases was, "Tie goes to the runner."  It was as if the phrase was whispered by the doctors into the ears of every newborn boy.  Without the benefit of umpires we would start yelling this incantation even before reaching the bag to ward off a tag.

I modified the phrase when I entered the realm of marketing to be, "Tie goes to the existing brand."  That one hasn't quite caught on, but it should.  And I'll keep telling clients when their concept is built solely on siphoning business from an existing brand that, "tie goes to the existing brand."

I had a client who opened a location less than 100 yards from a national competitor and chose to use a name very close to that competitor's name.  Despite heavy advertising, the store never met expected sales and we eventually changed the name.

For a more high profile example, I submit the following:

I saw an ad for BOBS.  The shoes look like this.

I get it, a comfy, casual shoe with the socially positive benefit.  That sounds like a fantastic idea... so great that TOMS has been doing it for several years.  

Skechers is a big company... 100 times larger than TOMS.  It seems that Skechers could do better than just ripping off a business model and a design.  Aside from the "dirty pool" aspects of the big guy steeling the little guy's home work, there is a real marketing reason not to lift the design and business model directly.  TOMS has made a big enough splash that Skechers is actually advertising for TOMS.  I see BOBS... I think TOMS.  Score one more impression for TOMS.  Since the price of the shoes is similar, there is no compelling reason for the consumer to consider BOBS apart from TOMS.  The tie goes to the existing brand!

At least Skechers could charge less for the shoes or have a different philathropic twist or slap a picture of Brooke Burke on the advertising.    

Words That Sell

I saw this billboard today and had to take a picture of it.  The advertiser is an established cemetery in the area.  It's very well respected and a lovely place with signature horse sculptures as seen on the sign above.  There are many things that could be said about this place.  Beautiful.  Serene.  Pastoral.  Historic.  Peaceful.  Instead of any of these, they chose "Convenient".

I wish I was in that creative meeting when either agency or client decided that cemetery plot purchasers (and that's all of us, if you think about it) wanted convenience from their cemetery.  I can imagine the client saying, "We see ourselves as the most convenient choice for people in the area," they might say.  Fair point.  The location is centrally located and I'm sure that if you call a friendly person will pick up and help you immediately.

However, this is a cemetery we're talking about.  "Convenient" reminds me of the old, prank answering machine message, "Bill's mortuary and delicatessen... you stab 'em we slab 'em."  Convenient is a drive through. Convenient is a one-hour cleaners.

No matter what word you slap on the billboard, cemeteries evoke a single concept... death.  And isn't death the ultimate inconvenience?  Nothing can ruin a schedule like death.  You don't hear someone say, "I've got to run in for my funeral on the way to work."  People don't beam, "We'll have his ashes back in an hour... we can still make is to the game!"

Advertising Congruence

When I watch television or read a newspaper the advertising and programming mesh relatively well 99% of the time.  I think it's a function of competent media planners and buyers making placements based on the viewers/readers.  You don't see a "feminine hygiene" commercial running during sports or a beard trimmer running during the soaps because that would be a waste.  Florists run ads in the obituaries, pediatricians don't.  There is a continuum of congruence when it comes to advertising media.  So, on the congruent end of the spectrum would be TV and newspaper.  Billboards are trying to stick out... so I guess it makes sense that you'd see a billboard advertising a strip club between a daycare and a church.  That puts billboards are on the other end of this continuum.

There are a couple of advertising media that are even less congruent than billboards, in my opinion: online display and cinema advertising.

I've had to install an ad blocker on the family computer to keep racy ads from displaying alongside flash games on a kid oriented site.  Incongruent.  To be specific one popular site is currently running the "controversial" Teleflora Superbowl ad featuring Adriana Lima alongside an ad for cupcakes.  The Teleflora ad is out of place.... the cupcake ad isn't.

Finally, cinema advertising is right beside online display on the incongruent side of the continuum.  I took my daughter to the rerelease of Star Wars in 3D.  This movie is PG rated and the majority of viewers were parents with kids.  We have a neighborhood dine-in theater that, while nice, doesn't benefit from the consistency of a large corporate operation.  The pre-show advertisements included 30 second ads for a church and a men's barbershop featuring a "beautiful female" staff.  Were the appropriate targets for each of the ads in the theater?  Of course there were.  Was I the only one explaining that I don't get my hair cut by a Hooter waitress... probably not.

Consumer Complaints

I started in this business working at a small direct mail agency.  We did work for various medical specialties.  Whenever a direct mail piece would drop, I would get a call from the office manager.  Generally, the office manager would be upset about phone calls from people who had received a copy of the piece.

"I've had a dozen phone calls from the post card this morning asking to have their names removed from the list," the person would say.

I went to the owner of the agency who gave me the greatest response to this call.

"A DOZEN calls... on the FIRST DAY!  That's PHENOMENAL!  Can I this as a feature in our next promotional piece?"

That generally did the trick... the office manager was reminded that response was the whole reason for advertising in the first place.  The call was a success for me, what the office did with that call was up to them.  Complainers always call first and they are a good gauge of the impact of the message and positive response yet to come.

Now that I'm on the client side, I'm closer to the complaints.  And now, with the widespread use of email, complaints are even easier to lob.  I've gotten all kinds.  My favorites are the ones that complain that the particular ad space that I'm using interferes with the reader's enjoyment of the newspaper and as a result the reader will never shop in my establishment. I generally send these folks gift certificates then I renew my contract reasoning that my visibility is good.

Today I got one saying that a television viewer saw my spot as one of 26 that ran in one hour of programming on one of the broadcast networks.  The writer said that my spot (and the 25 others) was skipped via DVR and that I was wasting the ad dollars.  If I could respond (fake email address) I would like to ask for a "Thank you" instead of a complaint since the ad dollars supported the programming he or she was enjoying.

The creative always brings out the most interesting complaints.  I'm currently running a spot comparing two customers.  One is slightly taller than the other and when we shot the ad the shorter man had the better facial expressions so he got to play the disappointed guy that went somewhere else to shop.  When we run the spot we get complaints that we're discriminating against short people.  Again, I know that the sales will be coming in because people are noticing the spots.

Complainers are a marketer's canary in the mine, a cheap early warning system.  No complainers, no impact.  The challenge is to keep the client from changing course at the first complaint.

See... I Told You So

The other day I posted about newspapers needing to stop the presses and contract with subscribers in exchange for the content and a tablet to read it on.  See the last paragraph of The Newspaper Deathwatch from the 12th of January.